There is only the present moment

I was checking the date for an appointment, and had a pause. ‘Wasn’t this thing supposed to be, like, a month from now…?’ I thought to myself.

Yet another month has passed so quickly it’s hard to believe.

When I was suffering of mental health problems that affected my daily life in every way possible, the only way I could differentiate between the days - which, to my exhausted mind, all seemed the same, gray porridge - was to keep a journal.

I started by writing one thing which made that day different from the previous one. It didn’t have to be a positive thing, just something different. Over the years, I have increased the amount of things I write to a minimum of five per day.

I’ve kept all of my journals. Reading back, it is surprising how many memories can be unlocked by a few words: where I was, what was I feeling, etc. Sometimes I even recall what I dreamed about the previous night, several years ago!

By keeping a journal, I managed not only to keep record of important things that had happened, but to also gather ‘evidence’ to myself that there is always something special about each day - I only need to pay attention.

I am occasionally anxious about the feeling of time passing by too quickly, like trying to hold water in cupped hands. I worry I am missing out on something or that I’m running out of time.

Journaling reminds me that the only thing that truly matters is this moment. The future and past are not things that exist anymore, we cannot touch the past nor future except in our minds. But the here and now, that which we can touch and experience, is real.

By immersing myself into the present moment with mindfulness helps me feel more alive, more present, and less anxious about the passage of time. Living fully and presently makes life seem to move slower and with greater intention and purpose. (I personally recommend books by Eckhart Tolle and Thich Nhat Hanh if this subject interests you.)

Let us face August with mindful intention.

-Lumi